A day in our life

Our life is a lot different than it was 3 months ago.  Our routine has changed quite a bit. I figured since I hadn't posted in a bit I would let you know our routine.

8:00 am-Wake up (sometimes Ana is up before hand), first blood test of the day, diaper change then her Lantus (long term insulin) injection.

8:30-9:00am breakfast, followed by carb counting and then figuring out her dose of Humalog (short term insulin).  After we figure out how many units of Humalog she needs .5-2.5 units depending on carbs and if she needs a correction from her first test.

9:00-12:00 playtime/or movies.  Sometimes we have a snack which is usually Cape Cod Potato Chips brand sea salt popcorn (4 carbs a snack cup).  She enjoys having her "juice" which is really water with flavor enhancers (0 carbs)

12:00-1:00 blood test #2 and then lunch.  After lunch we again count carbs and administer Humalog depending on carbs eaten and if she needs a correction.

1:00-3:00 prepare for a nap (which lasts 1-2 hours).

After nap until 6:00 more playtime and or movies (usually Disney Jr.)  Again we may have an occasional snack and juice cup.

6:00 is 3rd blood check and dinner, same routine as lunch and breakfast.

7:30-8:30 get ready for bed, after 9:00 bedtime blood check.  if it's over 300 we have to give insulin, but then she is down for the night.  She loves having a nighttime cup which is unsweetened almond milk (0 carbs :) )

2am-blood check, no adjustments given.  Usually a diaper change if wet and another cup of unsweetened almond milk.

2am kills me, usually I'm in bed by 11p-12a so 2am comes really quick for me, then it's hard for me to go back to sleep.

But that's our day in a nutshell.  We are more structured than we were 3 months ago, but I guess it's what we need to do.

I'm no longer her favorite

I think one of the hardest things for me to wrap my head around is that since Ana's diagnosis and hospitalization I am no longer her favorite parent, it's been a long time coming.  When she was born I was unemployed and remained that way until she  was 7 months old.  It hurts though, it really does.  Alex and I made the decisions we did because we felt it was the best.  I am only part time so I don't qualify for paid sick time where Alex has it.  So we decided that I would work the weekend while he stayed in the hospital with her.

When we got home the acting out started to get worse.  "Do you want Mommy?" "No" screaming  follows.  Recently it has really gotten to me at bed time.  Since we got home Anastasia has refused to go to sleep for me.  Her new routine is to read a book watch us play a game on our tablet or Alex's PSP and then she falls asleep.  Well that's how it is when Alex puts her to bed.  When I try it's a fight the whole time.  Last week she fought me so hard she slammed her head into my cheek.  It's still sore.  

I am at a loss.  I love her so much it hurts me to see her acting out at me.  When it's time to change her diaper I get kicked, repeatedly.  I try to discipline her but it rarely works.  If she doesn't stop by the time I finish changing her she goes in time out for 10 minutes.  

I guess it's just time for some tough love.  It's hard, she's only 2 & now she has an auto immune disease but a mom has to do what she must do.  

Thanks for reading this vent.  It's what has been on my mind lately.